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25 Thoughts & Questions I Had While Watching That CRAZY LEGION Premiere

Marvel X-Men fans, if FX’s LEGION has flown under your radar you need to get your life. Visually awe-inspiring, delightfully trippy, confusing AF, of all of the Marvel shows and films out there, LEGION is unlike any you have and ever will watch. In season 1, we meet the eccentric and catastrophe-prone, David Haller—AKA LEGION, an omega-level mutant with crazy-intense telekinetic abilities and a split mind. We’re still trying to figure out what all that means. If you haven’t watched season 1, stop reading now. All eight episodes are available on Hulu. Watch them and then watch them again (because I promise you, you’ll be confused after one viewing). For those of you in the know, I have some things I’d like to discuss with you.

Unsurprisingly, the season 2 premiere of LEGION was a complete acid trip. If you were able to make sense of season 1 after several binges (raises hand), you’re probably better versed at parsing the mind-bending storytelling, lush imagery, and random dance routines. I’ve only watched the premiere once but was seized by so many thoughts—equally excited and curious by David’s return, thrown by the Summerland crew’s Division 3 initiation, fearful of this new “psychological virus” that’s cropped up. I’m sure that many of the questions I have will be answered by the end of the season but as graduate of the school of LOST, I know there will surely be more and more mysteries to solve.

To start, here are 25 thoughts and questions that arose while watching LEGION: Chapter 9. (Big questions in bold)

1. “You’re inside the maze now. You cannot escape. Welcome to madness.” And thus begins another season of sleepless nights, huh? Think good thoughts.

2. Looks like Rational David is still hanging around. But somehow, I’m feeling uneasy about his presence. Can we trust him?

3. David’s been gone a year?! How? Where?

4. We’re going to revisit this David, Oliver, and Lenny clubbing scene, yes? Good.

5. David:“Can I kiss you?”

    Syd: “You better.”

    Me:

6. As scary as Farouk/Lenny is and as much as I want Oliver to return to Ms. Bird, surely I’m not the only one living for this eccentric villainous pair.

7. The catalyst, which causes the teeth-clattering trance en masse—this is why crowds terrify me—is a psychological virus. What does this mean?

8. Ms. Bird… is that you?

9. Ah, this kettle motif is quite interesting…

10. Wait, what is in that kettle, anyw— Ms. Bird, honey…

11. What. Is. That. Creature? Does Ms. Bird have her own Farouk-like parasite? Or is this just a manifestation of the demons she’s battling in Oliver’s absence? Or is this somehow… Oliver?

12. Is this Cary narrating? Or Clark? Who is this? Where are they? Ahem. Yes, yes. Tell me more about these delusions Farouk is planting and how society will ultimately saw their limbs off. (I guess this begins to answer question 7).

13. The Autotune Bowl-Cut Assembly is giving me the heebie-jeebies.

14. Alas, our season 2 mission is made plain: find Farouk’s physical form before he does. Is David’s father’s (ahem… Professor Charles Xavier, if you didn’t know) the key to finding Farouk in the flesh?!

15. Ptonomy is still extremely suspicious of David. I just want these two powerful minds to join forces, already!

16. Here it is, the club scene. Please, dance. Please, please, please, please.

17. Yes…

18. I have no idea what all this dancing means, but I love it and Aubrey Plaza is a goddess.

19. You can’t pull the wool over Syd’s eyes there, David. Why does David feel the need to hide things from Syd when they literally shared a very unique parasitic experience.

20. Can, um, I have my own Dan-Stevens-pointing compass, please and thank you?

21. There goes that “Babadook” chick slithering through David and Syd’s mental haven. Is Farouk’s hold on David now psychological? Or maybe it’s Syd in danger.

22. As much as I want to know what happened in the orb, I don’t like prolonged scenes in darkness.

23. I’m sorry what? HELP HIM? HELP FAROUK? YOU MEAN THIS GUY?

24. Future Syd has seen some sh*t.

25. The Syd and David orb scene was heartbreaking but I don’t have the brain capacity to understand that ending. Anxiously awaiting the next episode—and it’s probable it’ll confuse even more.

Until next week, folks. 

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